Friday, December 29, 2006

The Older I Get, The More I Love My Dog

Having had a history in law enforcement I can tell you that it is not all that difficult to have disgust and distrust for the seedier sides of humanity. I know that humans come first and animals have no mortal soul and so forth but take my argument, weigh it, and see if you agree with me even if in theory only.

1. Your dog will always be happy to see you even when you have the flu or when you accidentally knocked one of those antique plates off the china hutch and broke it.
2. After working outside, your dog doesn't really care how bad you smell. In fact, the raunchier your clothes are the happier he or she is to see you. Rolling in the clothes is optional.
3. A $3.00 bag of dog treats gains you as much affection as a $25,000.00 car does to a human counterpart.
4. I missed Valentine's Day, his birthday, and the anniversary of his AKC registration and he didn't say a thing, not one thing.
5. He barks at the mail man.
6. I am training him to bring beer on command. The only reward he cherishes is an ice cube.
7. My German Sheperd is a master at understanding human emotions directed towards him. When my wife is at home, his bed is on the floor. When she is gone, he doesn't even HAVE to ask nor does he when he jumps up on the bed.
8. When I leave on a trip he hangs his head in anguish and pouts. When I return a week later it's like I've been gone for months and he barely contains his excitement. Now to train my wife for the same response.

When all is said and done, the old dog is a true friend and loyal companion. No back talk, (unless he needs a treat) plenty of affection, and I don't have to bail him out or pay for a prom dress. All in all, a faithful pal indeed.

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